the every evolving sense of self
“It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for – and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.”
- ORIAH MOUNTAIN DREAMER
Defining your sense of self is more than what you do. It’s how you notice and understand yourself—your identity, values, beliefs, self-worth, likes, and dislikes. It’s about observing the many ways you show up in the world.
Who I am and how I define myself feels like an ongoing practice rather than an absolute, because the ways I see myself can shift from day to day, sometimes moment to moment.
Things I value
Honesty, integrity, compassion, kindness, accountability, curiosity, equality, gratitude, self-respect, friendship, open-mindedness, flexibility, dependability, courage, family, support, security, health, willingness, trust, pleasure, vulnerability, discipline, and wisdom.
Things I believe
I notice my belief in myself, in the general goodwill of humanity, and in the value of curiosity and kindness. I notice that words carry weight, that forgiveness is a gift to oneself, and that life is shaped by the meaning we choose to give it. Beliefs can shift, and noticing that is part of the ongoing practice for me knowing myself.
“Self-esteem is what we think and feel and believe about ourselves. Self-worth is recognizing ‘I am greater than all of those things.’”
- DR. CHRISTINA HIBBERT
My self-worth
My self-worth is NOT dependent on my job, my age, my relationship status, my appearance, my social media following, my net worth, my social circle, or anything external. I notice it through observing my choices, my efforts, and how I meet myself in each moment. My self-worth is a practice of me noticing and accepting where I am in my experiences.
How I feel about myself
Tenacious, grateful, hopeful, loved, loving, and filled with compassion. Imperfect and open to continue reflecting, exploring, and being present with myself. I notice that wherever I am in the process, I am enough.
Some things I like
Being in nature. Laughing out loud. Encounters with strangers. Exploring underutilized spaces in buildings. Playing board games. The smell of dirt and sweetgrass. Learning about what intrigues me. Singing from the heart. Drinking hibiscus tea. Watching bees communicate through dance. Ridiculously hot showers. Storytelling. The ocean. Open windows.
Some things I don’t like
Dehumanization. People not washing their hands. Food poisoning. Animal cruelty. Having to pee in New York City (or any major city with scarce public restrooms). Great books with terrible endings. Abuse. Intentional harm. Closed-mindedness. When doctors issue a prognosis. Unspoken expectations. Dishonesty. Littering. Disconnection.
As I share these insights into my sense of self, I notice that some things will deepen, some will shift, and some I may revisit. This is part of the ongoing practice of noticing who I am and how I am present in the world.